I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
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