So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Randomize
