I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
