tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
