Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
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