Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
