Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
