And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
We just shotgunned beers for America
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
