Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
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