My hair reeks of homosexuality.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
