Non-Jews are for practice
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize
