Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Randomize
