i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Randomize
