when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Porn is love you can see.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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