Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
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