You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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