So drunk its hurt
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
