So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
