3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize
