STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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