it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
