And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
