If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize