I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
