How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
