I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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