all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
