By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
We had sex on a dog bed..
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
