i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
