so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
