sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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