I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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