You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize
