I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize