We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
