I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Less talking, more tequila
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Randomize
