Nicole vs. Life
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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