She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
i out mim tonsoeep
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