Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
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