Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
