before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
NoShamevember. You game?
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
