..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
false alarm, still single
Randomize
