why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
should my penis look like a turkey
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
