redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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