FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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