it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
