Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
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