how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
And then he peed in my hair
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