You smell like stripper and shame
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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