BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Randomize
