it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
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