I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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